Putting The Pro In Procrastination

Hello, my name is J.P. And I am a procrastinator. Which means that I am a practitioner of the art of procrastination. Ummmmmmm, if you wouldn’t mind waiting just a moment, I have a couple of lottery tickets that I bought in October that I need to check. OK, I’m back. (Which is how you can tell that my tickets were not winners). Where was I – oh yes, procrastination.

Mirriam-Webster tells us that procrastination means “to put off intentionally the doing of something that should be done”. I prefer this definition to the one I found at Wikipedia, which describes procrastination as “the act of unnecessarily delaying or postponing something despite knowing that there could be negative consequences for doing so.” Wiki is being quite one-sided about procrastination, because any good procrastinator knows that, when done properly, good things can come from procrastination too.

We know that when properly done, procrastination has to pay off, or else, why would we do it? We all know about those things that seem important now, but nobody will think about in a month. Or maybe a year.

Last year, I acquired a cheap old car for the single purpose of driving to and from work. It has dents and rust, so I have not been bothered by its outward appearance – except for one thing: The alloy wheels were really grungy. Most people would have bought a bottle of spray wheel cleaner and gone to work. But to me, cleaning the wheels is like a gateway drug to spending too much time and attention improving a car that is best left unimproved.

But then a great thing happened. After a year, it became necessary to buy new tires. And do you know what happened in that process? The tire shop cleaned my wheels for me. Now I have clean wheels on my car and did not have to expend the time or effort to make them that way. This is a great example of procrastination paying off.

Another example from car ownership: I previously owned a minivan and one of the rear door handles broke. I bought the part, and even took it to a local body shop to have it painted. But I put off spending the better part of a day to disassemble the inside door trim and actually do the replacement. And do you know what? The car got in a wreck and was totaled. Problem solved! And all because of some expertly applied procrastination. Well, maybe that was more of an amateur job. (Just plain crastination?) A true expert in procrastination would have avoided spending money on the part.

What causes procrastination? With me, it might be youthful rebellion. My mother was definitely not a procrastinator. “Do it right now” was her motto. But I learned that doing something “right now” created openings for a bunch of other things to be done “right now” (after the first “right now” thing was finished). And before you knew it, you had all of these things finished but no time to sit around doing other worthwhile things like reading books or watching old movies on television.

Perhaps you are more like my mother and have not yet seen the value of procrastination. I will let you in on what could be the biggest bonanza for the well-rounded procrastinator. Where I live, the season of autumn is called fall because that is what eleventy bazillion leaves do this time of year, all of which seem to end up in my lawn. My neighbor’s method (and that of my mother before him) is to be out there after the first few dozen leaves have hit the grass. This means that is constantly out on his lawn tractor, pulling the big leaf vacuum contraption.

Me? The leaves fall just as quickly on my lawn as they do on his. But I have discovered that at least once every season there is a really windy day that comes along, which does much of the work for me. Then, with an hour or so making a single pass with my mulching mower and my fall yard work is done. It is true that my neighbor may resent my method, but if he followed it, just as many of his leaves would be in my yard as the number of my leaves in his, so who is doing it wrong?

Although I started writing this post a week ago, my well-developed habit of procrastination is the reason it was not finished until late last night early this morning. And why I need deadlines. Because without them, nothing would ever get written. Unless there are leaves to be raked. As there are right now. In which case, I will be right here at the computer, hammering away on some useful topic like this.

78 thoughts on “Putting The Pro In Procrastination”

  1. A secondary benefit to your method of procrastination with the leaves is your ostensibly-resentful neighbor is secretly pleased because a windy day that clears your leaves into his yard gives him another reason to justify the purchase of his leaf vacuum to his wife.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • I like the way you think! Yes, I am doing him a favor!

      The funny part is that for all of his obsessiveness about the leaves, he has never been able to get decent grass to grow in his shady back yard. Mine is shady too, but I have been less particular about the kinds of green stuff that will grow in those conditions and therefore only one of us has patches of brown dirt where there should be yard. And it isn’t me. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      • Obviously, another win for procrastination. It’s possible he’s more obsessed with the leaves than the grass? Or does he corner you to tell you about the grass seed he’s trying out this year, too?

        People here are obsessed with their yards. It borders on pathological.

        Liked by 1 person

      • My neighbor and I have shared a back yard boundary for the 30+ years I have lived here, and he was there for quite a few years before I moved in. We don’t see each other much, and in truth, I think that my landscape habits irritate him. Which is kind of another procrastination win for me – I can ignore the back yard and landscaping for months at a time while he is out working on his pretty regularly. Yet the view out the back of my house is his beautiful homestead while he gets to look at mine, which is not so nicely kept.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Again, you are helping him feel superior to you.
        “Look at that guy’s yard, Thelma,” he says to his wife. She harrumphs in sympathy, rolls her eyes (because she’s heard this every day for 30 years), and they silently judge you while secretly being envious of all your spare time to listen to Jazz.

        Liked by 2 people

  2. There is such a thing as methodical procrastination, of which it sounds like you are a member of that wise club. There are also the “do it right now” folks you mention, of which my mother is also one. There is a downside to this, as her (and other’s, I’ve noticed) “do it right now” is so strong it is counterproductive as it induces much hastiness. Being methodical is always wise and if it appears to be procrastination (or is accused of being), well, that’s not your problem. You don’t have to spend time to correct the errors as you got it right the first time.

    There is also another form of procrastination, that of the involuntary kind. A few weeks ago I got my beloved Dodge pickup back from the shop, it having a no-charge issue getting fixed (never tell the shop you aren’t in a hurry; they took two months). On the way home, the left front brake seized so hard the old girl was smoking. I had to give it throttle to go down steep hills it was that seized. Naturally, I ordered parts (somewhat) immediately. Since then, there has been the reversion back to normal time, rain on the weekends, and a prolonged bout of being under the weather. So, she still sits, awaiting (yet another) repair. That’s the involuntary kind of procrastination, into which camp I seem to fall.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • You describe why I still see value in old school drum brakes.

      You raise a great point about being hasty and having to do a job twice. Such a thing is to be avoided if at all possible!

      Like

      Reply

  4. So, procrastination isn’t bad…it just needs to be judiciously applied. The key is when to apply it. You could develop a metric of when to do so…eventually.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. You’ve likely read that nowadays, the advice for raking is generally “don’t”. Leaf cover promotes biodiversity, insect life, insulates your grass, and gives something for all of those squirrels and chimpmunks to do outdoors versus their coming into your house and garage to do whatever that is that they do. It’s said that if you have very heavy leaf cover, well, then some raking may be ok…except I’d say that it takes pretty much up to Thanksgiving to be able to tell just how heavy that cover is. And by then, it might snow and you can just take care of it next Spring. At least that’s what I do. Procrastinate? Me????? Naaaaaaah.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  6. I use the same method of dealing with the leaves as you do. Works just fine. And yes, my lawn is often lusher than my neighbor’s (he has professionals “sanitize” his lawn with blowers every week). When you remove all leaves and grass clippings from your lawn, the grass lacks the nutrients those things naturally provide.

    Procrastination: You should always do what excites you the most at a given moment. Excitement is the way your Higher Self tells you, “This is what you should be doing.” If you’re not excited about something, you shouldn’t do it. In your two examples, you procrastinated (because you were not excited about doing those tasks) and in both cases the situation worked out well. You see, the system works.

    If you’re excited about doing something but you’re not sure of the outcome or it doesn’t make any rational sense, you should do it anyway. The reason for your excitement will soon become apparent. Then you will say, “I’m glad I did that!”

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • I agree – when I’m excited about something, it goes quickly and easily. And the benefit is that it’s an easy way to put off the things that don’t excited.

      My brother in law is a longtime farmer. Years ago he pointed out the stupidity of bagging grass clippings, especially if you have applied fertilizer. “You’re paying for nutrients and are then just throwing them out before they have done all they can do for you”.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  7. When I started college fifty years ago, there was a very long, seriously depressing list of courses you had to take in order to graduate. Some students bit the bullet and took the worst stuff first to get it over with, but not me. I was raised Evangelical Protestant and had been taught to believe that Jesus might return at any moment, and that being the case, why should I do anything distasteful if it could be put off until later? Maybe Jesus would come back and I would never have to do it at all! Well, even though Jesus didn’t come back, my procrastination paid off big time when, about two-thirds of the way through my college career, they changed the physical education requirement from nine courses to six. If I’d ever had any misgivings about my habit of putting off unpleasant things, they vanished at that point. Any habit that could save me from the misery of three courses in P.E. couldn’t possibly be bad.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    • Christ’s return is always a great thing, whether it supports procrastination or not!

      And I love your story! When I was lawyering, I had to rack up 36 hours of continuing education every 3 years, with a minimum of 6 hours a year. My habit was to do the minimum in the first 2 years then cram the rest in December of the 3rd year. One year they changed the rule and allowed all of it to be online, which saved a gob of time attending live seminars multiple times a year.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  8. There used to be a store in the mall that carried those “fake” motivational posters, that copied those terrible posters and items your cheapskate boss used to to give you instead of a raise for good work! I think the “fake” store was called “Depressories” (because the actual real store was called Successories). Anyway, my favorite poster had a large picture of a person staring off into the abyss of a canyon, and the type underneath it said something like: “Motivation and Focus pays off in the long run, but Procrastination and Laziness pays off today!” Yes Sir!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  10. JP, I do get procrastination and sometimes I feel like using Scarlett O’Hara’s line “Fiddle-dee-dee, “I’ll think about that tomorrow”. My life was more regimented when I worked, than now that I am retired as I thought of my days like a pie and how best to divvy the hours up for more “me time”. As for leaves, I am the only person on the street that rakes them. “Gone with the wind” might describe how this street’s leaves are. Yesterday I returned home from a long walk in a big park and saw that my neighbor had yanked out all his annuals from the front yard – that last frost killed them. And, while he was at it, he uncharacteristically blew all the leaves from his lawn AND mine into the street. While that might have been a welcome sight for me, it was not, because the City enforces the ordinance of not putting leaves in the street. They need the revenue, so the Animal Control Officer is usually looking for trouble. So I had to stop and bag up three yard waste bags of leaves. I wanted to bag them wet with my cymbal-style leaf rakes, as it’s easier and we were having rain this morning, but alas, it was a ticket or rake leaves.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • That is the worst – when your “do it now” neighbor forces you to do a job sooner than you needed to.

      In my old hometown, we used to rake to the curb and a couple of times a season a big city vac truck would come along and suck them up. Bagging seems so wasteful.

      My first year here, I filled 110 bags. Since then I’ve started mulching them with the mower and life is so much easier.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      • I wasn’t happy believe me! We are having some snow tonight and I put the bags under the patio awning as you know I’ll be mad if the bags get soaked and I have to re-bag them. I can’t imagine 110 bags – that’s incredible! On the bright side, the leaves cover up the black walnuts so it keeps the squirrels away – I hope your squirrel situation has improved. Our street cleaners will come along until the end of November and push around what leaves fly into the street and a dump truck collects them at the cross street. The vacuum truck sounds interesting. A friend in New York lives in a small village and they issue big tarps and you rake the leaves onto the tarp and the City workers manually empty the tarps into dump trucks.

        Liked by 1 person

  12. That was so funny! I much prefer the dictionary definition too…it’s less judgmental. Sometimes procrastination can be a good thing…..I think of obtaining my Michigan license in 2003 where I spent $1000 and 6 months studying for the foreign equivalency exam and 3 weeks after I passed it the government said I no longer needed it, and could just proceed to the state board exam. If only I had procrastinated a bit. I’m generally not a procrastinator, except when it comes to buying a new car, (the first step of which would be actually looking for one), which I have managed to put off for years….and now that winter weather is coming surely I should wait until spring….

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  14. I admire your approach to handling leaves in the fall. Also I didn’t look too closely at your leaf picture up top, and so for a minute I thought it was a closeup on pizza toppings, which is fitting given that pizza is what I end up eating when I procrastinate on cooking.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  15. I admire your examples of the benefits of procrastination J P, because I can’t come up with (m)any of my own. Maybe the leaves you refer to. I’m putting the raking and mulching just as you are, and tomorrow we’re expecting some pretty good wind. I have a neighbor like yours who keeps her property pristine. Used to bother me every time she’d jump on the mower but then I realized she doesn’t have much else going on in her life, so good on her. Just hope all my leaves don’t head her way after the wind (I try to be a good neighbor). Also, I find my iPhone “Tasks” to be a wonderful procrastination tool. I put everything in there on date-sensitive lists I won’t forget. If I get a pesky reminder that it’s actually time to do a task? I can change it to a later date! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

      • LOL… are you referring to ME! I admit, I haven’t been on WP as much as I used to. I used to come on daily. Then, something happened, not sure what, but I haven’t been coming on daily. When that happens, I have to decide how far back I go to read posts. I mean, if we are off for 6 days, a lot has gone on. So, if I miss one of yours, it’s not on purpose. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

  17. I read this a few days ago, but am just now getting around to commenting…

    I just checked my Random House Unabridged Dictionary, and its definition is even more neutral.  “To defer action; delay” and “To put off till another day or time; defer.”  No hints of shaming you about something that should be done.

    I like your example of the minivan door handle, and having the problem solved by procrastination.  I live for moments like that.  Recently, though, I had one of those moments boomerang back at me. 

    One of the little tasks that I always put off is cleaning the inside of car windows.  It’s time consuming, has to be done in the shade, and I never seem to get it streak-free on the first try, which means re-doing part of the job.  Typically, I put off that task until I realize that I can’t actually see out of the windshield at night.  Recently, I was in the process of delaying cleaning the windshield of one of our cars, and then that car developed a crack in the windshield, which necessitated a replacement.  I joked that I was paying $400 for a windshield cleaning.  The new windshield was nice and clean for a while, but then I guess it had a chemical coating (or something) and it got dirty real quick.  Which meant I not only spent $400, but I still had to clean the windshield a few weeks later.  Oh well… can’t win ‘em all!

    Oh, and what tire shop do you use that cleans wheels?  I might stop by there and get some new tires next time I’m in Indiana!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • My WP app on my phone has been wonky lately, which has allowed me to put off responding to comments. I think the tire shop may have only cleaned them in order to get weights to stick. But I will take the gift however I can get it. And I put off cleaning the inside of car window glass too, right up until it is so irritating that I can’t deal with it anymore. Vacuuming the carpets in the car is far easier to put off, because you don’t need clean car floors to see. 🙂

      Like

      Reply

  19. Boy, I can relate to this. My projects — when I finally motivate to do them — get derailed so easily. A scrapbook to go through, old photos too. It’s a wonder I get anything done at all.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    • The secret, I have decided, is to have a project like this come up when there are other, more important things to be done. That way you can put the important stuff off and organize the photos instead. 🙂

      Like

      Reply

  22. Oh my gosh, I relate to this so much 😂 I’m a huge procrastinator too. I’ve got half-written blog entries sitting quietly in my drafts and stacks of books waiting for their moment. But over time I’ve realised that my procrastination isn’t always a bad thing. When I force myself to write while I’m not really feeling it, the piece ends up half-hearted. And with books, I honestly believe you only read them when you’re ready to actually absorb them. So sometimes putting things off is just life’s way of waiting for the right timing, and when that timing comes, everything just lands better.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • Yes, let’s not even talk about blog posts that got started and have never been finished. But I like your attitude on this – looking for the right time is not a bad thing.

      Like

      Reply

  25. I do not know if it is procrastination or poor time management skills or possibly it’s because I am very easily distracted, and I mean VERY easily. Where was I? oh yes procrastination, loved the article.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  26. I loved this blog post so much. I am definitely a procrastinator. There are things that require deadlines and need to be worked on as soon as possible, but then there are some things that do not. I loved that you mentioned needing deadlines because I do too. I have decided quite recently that I will write a blog every two weeks. Then maybe I would write more (I have a lot of ideas).

    The rent gets paid every 25th of the month on time, work tasks with deadlines get done on time… but if there is no deadline? It feels unimportant to me. I am almost 30 and I am still trying to figure it out. But as a procrastinator with a lot of interests… the deadline method works haha

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • The lack of work deadlines is one of the biggest joys of life, after I retired from a “real” career and am now spending my last few working years as a blue collar guy who is done with everything at the end of each day.

      Like

      Reply

  31. About 30 years ago, I posted this “FAQ” on a procrastination message board. Since those folks were trying to “overcome” procrastination, it was upsetting to a lot of them.

    =====================
    A Procrastination FAQ
    =====================

    A FREQUENTLY ASK QUESTION: “How can I overcome procrastination?”

    MY ANSWER: Quit worrying about what you ought to do, and begin to trust
    your own desire–do what you want to do. Allow those areas of your life
    that cannot be sustained with a measure of joy to fall by the way side. If
    you will do this, new horizons will open up before you which offer
    challenges which you will accept with more enthusiasm. Here are the rules
    by which I live (this is *my* way, what’s yours?):

    1. Remember your essential Self. All of us have an essence to actualize,
    a potential to realise–just as the Oak tree is contained in the acorn, we
    have a Self to actualize. Often, we procrastinate because we are trying
    to be something which we are not. Keeping our mind on *our* business is
    not easy, but the remaining 3 rules will help.

    2. Say “Yes” to life, unconditionally–including suffering and death which
    is your destiny. Your duty is to your Self–the “acorn”, as it were, that
    is your life. Do the best you can to create the conditions in which it
    (you) can flourish, but accept that which is beyond your control.

    3. Beware of the spirit of resentment and revenge. Look for solutions to
    problems, not somebody to blame.

    4. Follow your bliss–do what you want! If you trust your instincts, they
    will eventually lead you areas of endeavor where you will thrive.

    In short, you are procrastinating because you REALLY have more important
    things to do. Begin trusting yourself today. Let your watch words be
    “I Am” and “I Will!” You don’t have to whip yourself into eating or
    sleeping or going to bathroom or making love, neither should you have to
    whip yourself into doing other things.

    *******

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

      • A “To Do List” can be very helpful in this regard as long as we realize that the list is our servant, not our master. In other words, the list is a reminder of things we thought were important when we made it, but in the course of the day, our priorities may change. Some things will be done. Other things will be left undone. With regard to the latter, if it seems good to us, we can carry them over to tomorrow’s list. Or, if not, we can let them slide. What a wonderful life!

        https://amemoforyou.wordpress.com/

        Liked by 1 person

      • This is a great point, Wayne. As you note, those lists can start out helpful but can become things we run and hide from when they get too long!

        Like

Leave a comment