What Is A Vanilla Wafer? – Wherein The Readership Becomes The Jury

I do not typically employ this forum as a method for settling household disagreements. Today, however, such a thing has become necessary. Your humble scribe was recently on a shopping errand. In his possession was a list which included an item described as “vanilla wafers”. Your author brought home the product he understood to be “vanilla wafers”. However, upon review of the purchases, Marianne expressed some combination of surprise, disappointment (and maybe a little befuddlement over the choice made by her spouse) because what came home was definitely NOT the product she had requested.

So, dear readers, the question: What is a “vanilla wafer”?

I will begin this project with a notice: I do not intend to share which idea of “vanilla wafer” was (and is) held by your author and which was (and is) held by your author’s spouse. Your author’s household intends for this to be an education exercise, and not one intended to bash one or the other (figuratively, of course) over the head. Although bashing the other over the head with the product that is NOT a “vanilla wafer” has possibly been a thought entertained by each participant, however fleetingly.

It is also necessary to explain one thing. Both JP and Marianne were raised as the eldest child in our respective childhood households. This means only one thing. If there is a single proposition that has been true during the entirety of our thirty-three year marriage, it is this: That each of us has always had and will always have knowledge of the unshakable and indisputable truth that each of us is always right about everything and deserving of the other recognizing that most basic piece of Universal Verity. Yes, this is how you can tell that two people truly love each other – when two first-borns can thrive as partners in marriage for over three decades.

That bit of housekeeping aside, let us examine the contenders for the title of “The Real Vanilla Wafer”. There is the Nabisco product, in a box with the name “Nilla Wafers” on it. The proponent of this product cites the fact that “Nilla” is short for “vanilla” and that this spouse’s mother always called these “vanilla wafers.”

The other product is made by Voortman, and is explicitly called “Vanilla Wafers”. The proponent of this product cites the fact that it explicitly says “Vanilla Wafers” on the package and that this spouse’s mother always called these “vanilla wafers”. Do you see our problem?

Wikipedia is no help, because there is no specific entry for “vanilla wafers”. OK, the free wiki dictionary does, but only to cite a bit of derogatory slang for a white person. Therefore, I suppose our disagreement could have escalated into each of us saying “YOU”RE a vanilla wafer!”, but thankfully it did not. There is a page for “Nilla Wafer” which is about the Nabisco product, and another page for “wafer” that describes the basic component of the Voortman product.

A history of the Nabisco product says that these cookies were actually called “Vanilla Wafers” from their introduction in 1889 until 1967, when “Nilla” was substituted in the brand name. (This lends credence to one spouse’s mother’s historical usage. The response is that 1967 was a long time ago, and is certainly not 2023).

Voortman is a Canadian company and a much more recent brand, dating to 1951 when it was founded by brothers who were Dutch immigrants. It now appears to be owned by Hostess Brands (home of the Twinkie). The company’s website lists “wafers” in multiple flavors. In addition to vanilla, there are “Chocolate Wafers”, “Strawberry Wafers”, “Lemon Wafers”, “Raspberry Wafers” and “Peanut Butter Wafers”. It is difficult to be too hard on the mother of the other spouse who called this product a “vanilla wafer” when that is, in fact, what it kind of is.

Keebler, incidentally, makes a similar product which it calls “Vanilla Sugar Wafers”. The spouse who favors the Nilla as the “real” vanilla wafer believes that products like these are generically called “sugar wafers”. The other spouse replies with something along the lines of “nonsense”. Keebler’s website is no help as the product description describes these as “light, crispy vanilla wafers”. “See?” says the spouse who favors the Voortman claim to “vanilla wafer”.

The first spouse may, however, retort (with no small amount of satisfaction) that Keebler also makes something called “Vanilla Wafers” that is just like the cookies in the Nilla box. Here you thought that Keebler was just known for cookies, when they are also purveyors of mild cases of marital discord.

Both of us can agree that each product, while different from the other, has its own unique charm and a long history as a favorite occasional treat. The Voortman product (or others like it) were long enjoyed by the person on Team Nilla, most commonly at grandma’s house. The Nabisco cookie was also frequently and eagerly consumed by the Team Voortman spouse during childhood.

So now we ask you: Which one of these would you pick up if you were at the store and held a list which included “vanilla wafers” on it?

Lest you among the readership starts to feel some level of control over the happiness of your author’s marriage, don’t get too comfortable in that spot. The disagreeing spouses who are the subject of this question are in agreement over one thing: Both varieties of cookie taste good and are a fine snack when one craves a touch of sweetness after dinner. Each spouse, however, reserves the right to engage in just a mild bit of gloating, depending on the results of this survey. So now . . . let’s have it!

33 thoughts on “What Is A Vanilla Wafer? – Wherein The Readership Becomes The Jury”

  1. Of course I’m going with the Voortman wafers, the company is located just around the corner from my office. Until recently they were still privately owned by the Dutch immigrant family that started it in the 50’s. depending on the wind direction we can get either a whiff of cookies or a whiff of industrial slaughterhouse, which is not as nice.

    Never heard of Nilla wafers before.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  2. Sorry to who ever is going to lose this argument, but there’s zero doubt in my mind that a wafer is the crème filled oblong treat, which also comes in multiple flavors other than vanilla. Nabisco and Keebler may be calling their wares wafers, but they are just plain cookies. BTW, the “sugar wafers” are also known to my family members as “grandma cookies” because your grandma always bought them and had them around because they were cheap! I salute your financial status in society, shown here by your purchase of wafers from Voortman or Keebler, but you’ve made a major error as these wafer style crème filled treats are covered by multiple off brands manufacturers, for far cheaper than the upscale brands, and in some cases, far tastier, as there are vanilla wafers that are wider and thicker than the brands you show, and have a more orangish colored crisp part that seems to be a ice cream cone consistency. Only the money flush would purchase either vanilla wafers or fig cookies (Fig Newton style) in anything but the cheap off brands, which in many cases can be less than half the price of the name brands!

    The dictionary definition of wafer, which I had to look up, agrees with my overall impression that relative thinness seems to be a theme among the actual usage of wafer. Think computer chips or if you’re Catholic, the communion host. In this case, neither of these treats approach “wafer-ish-ness”, that would earn them the wafer designation. I can also chime in here that after a life time being in advertising and advertising adjacent industries, anyone who’s looking for proper literacy usage among advertising brands names or spellings on products is engaged in a fools errand! There may also be regional geographic usage differences wrapped up in this as well! Good luck!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • Good points, all. I think everyone’s grandmas had those wafers. And yes, Nilla starts at a disadvantage when trying to make something that looks like a small cookie into a wafer.

      Like

      Reply

  3. This firstborn of two firstborns is happy to pipe in on this…

    The Nabisco product is a (va)Nilla wafer and this is what comes to mind upon hearing the term “vanilla wafer”. The Voortman product has always been referred to as a sugar wafer, albeit available with vanilla flavoring. Furthering my thoughts is the (va)Nilla wafer not appearing to be available in other flavors, strengthening the argument of the one who maintains it is a (va)Nilla wafer.

    As one who never had either of these brands growing up (store brands or generics were my experience) the (va)Nilla wafer type cookies were also called vanilla wafers (or something reasonably close) by these other brands with the Voortman facsimiles always being sugar wafers.

    Part of me wonders if some differences in regional vernacular are at play here. This could be a form of the age old pop/soda/coke thing in the US or the subject items being referred to as biscuits in other English speaking countries. Nobody is wrong but the interpretation by the audience can be the big pitfall.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • You are exactly in line with one of us, who says one is a vanilla wafer and the other is a sugar wafer.

      I think the biggest problem is with the people who don’t agree with me. 🙂

      Like

      Reply

  4. A fascinating discussion! And it put me in mind of cookies I used to love but haven’t eaten in ages: Social Teas and Vienna Fingers. I think they are still made, though probably hard to notice on the cookie aisles, which are crammed with 200 varieties of Oreos.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. Well first let us take a step back and consider the facts in the case.
    Each has their own merits. The Nilla wafers used to be called Vanilla Wafers, thus may stake a claim for the moniker. They also give 140 calories as a selling feature. Voortman’s offering has milk and eggs, and is baked with real vanilla! Keebler’s are baked with care, and artificially flavored, (Leaving out the U in flavoured).
    I postulate that given the facts and the ingredients, and the amount of care given to preparation of each, it is like comparing apples to oranges. Each have their own traits, but one cannot take the place of the other. It’s like Arrowroot and Milupa cookies. Each has its own merit.
    So, pressed for a vote, I have determined that the Nabisco (dare we say Christie’s) brand wins the day. Nothing smelled vanilla more than when these were being baked at the factory in Toronto for mass consumption. I just wish they had kept the name as Vanilla Wafers, rather than trying to create a new market niche.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • I always wondered if they changed the name to “Nilla” after someone argued that they were using artificial flavors instead of actual vanilla – something not unheard of in the mid 60s.

      And you are right that when you have a taste for one of them, the other is not a substitute.

      Like

      Reply

      • …actually likely the FDA would not allow you to call something vanilla unless it was actually real vanilla, like Kraft American “cheese food” vs. real cheese.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. You’ve done an admirable job presenting both sides of this issue! There’s compelling evidence for the ‘Nilla camp and the Voortman camp.

    Perhaps some context would’ve been helpful. Should the desired product have been wanted for a recipe, the ‘Nilla wafers might’ve been the proper choice. Such wafers are popular ingredients in dishes that also include banana pudding. In my experience, the Voortman style wafers are usually consumed directly.

    Either way, a tasty dilemma for the weekend. This might require some hands-on research! 😉

    Like

    Reply

    • The request was not for a recipe, so the field was wide open. The result was the purchase of both and as you predicted, the research was thoroughly enjoyable.

      Like

      Reply

  7. I guess it has been a long time since I bought vanilla wafers (the Nabisco kind) because I didn’t know they were now Nilla Wafers. The only time I used them was to make a vanilla wafer crust. We didn’t buy the other kind of vanilla wafers ever. So, in our family, vanilla wafers are the round cookies though it seems to me that the rectangle ones fit my definition of ‘wafer’ better than a round cookie does…

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • I used to eat the Nilla version by dropping them in milk and fishing them out with a spoon. I also saw them used as bottom crust for cheesecake cupcakes.

      I’ll bet the others could be used in recipes too. And either Marianne or I agrees with you completely! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  8. An only child will weigh in JP. Growing up I don’t recall seeing those “round things” a/k/a Nilla Wafers – perhaps we didn’t have them in Canada back then (early 60s). I know people use those “round things” in a pudding-type dessert. To me they are cookies. A wafer is something that is “wafer thin” (catch phrase right?) so that a light and airy wafer with the sweet icing sugar/creme inside is a wafer. We had them in the Summertime with sherbet or ice cream, sometimes stuck into the ice cream, so Mom didn’t have to heat up the kitchen baking cookies. I’ve not had them in years. A company named “Ritter” made wonderful sugar wafers – the filling was not as sugary-sweet, but they were not worth the price for little more than one serving.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • It’s funny how one or both of these resonate with everyone’s childhood. I had not thought about the Nabisco product not being available in Canada, but it’s quite possible.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

    • I wonder if your Ritter is the same Ritter, which I assumed was European, that makes those fantastic square candy bars, in many permutations, with both cookie wafers with chocolate, as well as hazel nuts, in dark and light, etc., etc. I lived off of those the many years I lived in Washington DC, and was delighted when my upscale local grocery store started carrying them a few years ago! Might be called Ritter Sport Bar?

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      • It is the same Ritter Sport Bar Andy and it is German. I love them too! No comparison to the regular sugar wafers as Ritter bars are so rich and creamy. A friend of my boss owns a cheese shop at Eastern Market in Detroit and he sells a lot of German goodies and he would drop off Ritter Sport Bars, ginger biscuits and chocolate Christmas tree ornaments at our office at Christmastime. Then I started working from home and went to an upscale produce market after Googling for Ritter Sport Bars – $3.50 for each bar and that was back around 2011.

        Like

      • Yes Linda! I remember paying about $2.50 for those bars in DC (would have been around 2004), and when my local high-end grocery started carrying them recently, they were pushing $4, and post pandemic, now pushing $5! I’ll still get one occasionally, even at that price! Per your instructions, I saw Amazon selling combo packs of one of each flavor! Sounds dangerous to the blood sugar!

        Like

  9. Okay, so Mrs. Herb and TNT both asked, “Doesn’t he have a cell phone? Why didn’t he call if he wasn’t sure?” “Well,” I said, “He was sincere that he really thought he knew what she meant.” “Obviously he didn’t.” So I dropped that conversation.
    The question to me is, was Marianne planning on serving banana pudding or ice cream? Ice cream would need the sugar wafer type and banana pudding would need the cookie type. I would have just gotten both using the indecision as an excuse to have some tasty cookies around the house one way or another.

    Like

    Reply

    • I never actually thought there was an issue until after I brought “the wrong one” home. I should have just decided to buy both of them, figuring that I could eat up any mistake. 🙂

      I think she just had a yen for one of them. Both of us ended up enjoying both. Do we know how to have a good time or what? 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  10. Without any other context, I would pick the Nilla Wafers. I suspect this is because iny childhood I don’t remember the Voortman style cookies coming in single flavors. What I recall is a package that was 1/3 vanilla, 1/3 chocolate & 1/3 pink (strawberry?)

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  11. I believe the round wafers are the Vanilla Wafers but I would have purchased both products. My wife and I are both first borns in big families and I know exactly what you mean. Being right is not enough. We each need the other to acknowledge it. This is a recipe for disaster but we celebrate our 54th Anniversary in a few weeks!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  12. I am from the folks who were around before nabisco changed the name to a baby talk name. I never heard of Voortmans. They make sugar wafers, various flavors, which were around and were called sugar wafers. There were various vendors. Vanilla wafers were the round cookies that were called thus. Both sugar wafers and vanilla wafers were around just called differently. If I want the voortmans I would specify sugar wafers.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

Leave a comment